Dear Emily,
Your letter to me on breast feeding was so timely. I am definitely in a battle with it and I think it has kept me from really realizing your struggles with weaning. In my head, I was thinking how great it was to be done and how much easier it would be to explore town without having to find an appropriate place for an inexperienced nurser to nurse (er... reveal herself, haha!)
Today, I gave in and went back to the lactation consultant. My Julie is seven weeks and I am still in terrible pain. It kills me to dread feeding her sometimes, because I know the pain that comes with her initial latch and then continues after the feeding. I cried last week and almost made the decision to quit, but when I think about it, I am really devoted to seeing it through. Throughout my entire pregnancy, I looked forward to nursing and then to have it be so miserable is heartbreaking. I have been thinking it is a latch issue and trying to correct it and really putting a lot of stress on the baby and me. She is getting bigger and her arms are getting stronger and her flailing is getting more wild and what I learned today is that it is impossible to correct a latch that is not incorrect. It seems that I have either an allergy to lanolin or yeast. Either way, I have hope.
Every time that I go see the lactation consultant, I leave energized and motivated. They always encourage me so much and with that I know that I can see this through. I love going to see them so much that it makes me consider becoming one. I think it would be so wonderful to encourage new moms struggling through their first few days and weeks of motherhood. It's such a tumultuous time!
Anyways, I am sticking with this thing. I want to love it as much as you do and treasure this time. I also want to drink as many chocolate shakes as I want and enjoy that whole pan of brownies. It's such motivation to forge onward!
Love, Jen
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