I get it... I do! It seems like living and enjoying the moments and drinking it all in has become more important than everything else. Documenting life falls by the wayside... I have been memorizing the moments in my mind instead. I stop and smell and listen and really enjoy.
The crackling candle, the smell of my baby's head... the way that she wraps her arms around my neck and ruffles her fingers through my hair. The way her crying has turned to babbling complaining... I even love that. I feel like she is really trying to tell me something.
The holidays came and went so fast. It was such a blessing to have Travis home for five days in a row. I wish he could retire now and stay home with us forever.
I am treasuring the mornings right now. I go get the baby at her first morning cry, bring her to bed with me, nurse her, we fall back into a drowsy morning nap together. I love the way her eyes flutter open when she is waking, rubbing them not so gently, then realizing that I am there and she grins at me. I love that moment. Jackson at the foot of the bed. We lay here touching hands, playing for awhile, not wanting to leave the moment.
We get up and I fix us both our breakfast and we sit down at the table with my cup of tea and we eat together.... someone to share breakfast with every morning... what I have been longing for. After that it seems like the morning always speeds up, but those first 2 hours are so good and I refuse to let them go.
Such beauty and heartache in this New Year. Please be patient with me this year. I'll need you more than ever.
Love, Jen
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